42mm x 191mm… or: submission guidelines for review stuff

May 22, 2011 at 5:34 pm | Posted in blog info, no audience underground | Leave a comment

Much to my surprise, radiofreemidwich seems to have reached a kind of critical mass.  After taking over a year to reach 4000 hits, getting to 7000 has only taken three months more.  My post on Ceramic Hobs garnered over 100 hits in a single day and was apparently mentioned on that twitter and facebook.  This officially makes me an internet sensation on a par with Justin Bieber or, erm…, the hamster dance?  Sorry, memes aren’t my strong point.

Joking aside, I suspect that the tiny potential audience for these meanderings has now been more or less realised.  In the hope of reaching this elite, a handful of optimistic players in the no-audience underground have been in touch offering me stuff that I might be tempted to review.  This is very gratifying, and I have responded enthusiastically, but a tiny part of me is concerned enough to lay down a few ground rules.

It was tempting to fish out the infamously harsh demo submissions policy from the fencing flatworm recordings manifesto but there is no need for that.  Back then I lost days of my finite and irreplacable life feeling compelled to listen to 74 minute CD-rs of Scandanavian bollock-scratching.  Now I won’t bother.  Thinking about it, the only thing I’m going to insist on is this:

42mm x 191mm

These are the dimensions of my letterbox’s aperture.  If you wish to send me physical objects then please make sure your package is not too meaty to be stuffed through this orifice.   If I have to go to the sorting office to pick it up I will get the hump: it is a long walk and their opening hours are not entirely helpful.  If you felt like being all 21st Century about it then you could do what one space-age correspondent has done and zip up a bunch of mp3s, leave the folder on rapidshare and send me a link to go fetch ’em.  I can manage that.

Once these things are in my possession the next set of conditions will apply: 1.  If I don’t like the music then, unless some other aspect of your project intrigues me, I will politely decline to write about it.  I’d like to keep the blog positive.  2.  If you send me a bunch of stuff then I reserve the right to ignore some bits, pick my favourites and just write about those.  3.  I can’t promise a definite turnaround time, though I will promise to at least try everything that arrives here and give it a fair mulling over.  Should this sound reasonable, then feel free to email me at the address on the ‘about me and this blog’ page.

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